The original Springfield Southern is no more

Discussion in 'HO Scale Model Trains' started by kokoracer, Apr 26, 2008.

  1. kokoracer

    kokoracer Member

    My wife and I had an argument yesturday. She made a threat to do some serious damage to my layout. Rather than risk losing a substancial investment in track and equipment, I chose to breakdown and box everything I could.

    The argument ended and I found myself with a several boxes of track and no track plan. A new SSR has risen from the ashes overnight.

    The new layout has less yard space and more spurs. Changing track location and adding a duck under, yielded a longer main line run. The only major casualty was the East Yard and team track.

    Any ideas as to how to avoid problems like this in the future? I am going to try to get her involved. I am oen to suggestions. John
  2. Ralph

    Ralph's for fun!

    Wow John. Not to get too into your personal life but it sounds to me like you might want to work on the relationship first and the layout second. Threats to do damage to a layout suggest there needs to be some re-establishment of mutual respect and regard. If the issue involves the amount of time you spend on the hobby as opposed to time spent with her then some compromises may need to be discussed. You might never get her interested in the layout but at the least you may be able to do things to avoid her being resentful of it. Good luck.
  3. Herc Driver

    Herc Driver Active Member

    Yikes! Save the real investment - your relationship. (But boxing everything up is a good call too.) I agree with Ralph whole-heartedly. Sound advice.
  4. nachoman

    nachoman Guest

    Gotta agree with Ralph 100% here. And I will second the comment that you may never get her involved. You can't force her to get involved in ANYTHING, because you will risk her resenting you more. Sounds to me like it is time to take some time out from the modeling, do some armchair modeling or planning in your head for awhile, and work your marriage to whatever it needs to be. You will be much happier in the long run.

  5. cidchase

    cidchase Active Member

    just don't do what I did
  6. Ralph

    Ralph's for fun!

    Good to hear from you Cid, but you know we're wanting to ask, "what did you do!?" :)

  7. Very simply put,"The Best Things In Life Are Not Things"

    Good luck
  8. sgtcarl

    sgtcarl Member

    Much to my amazement, and delight, I have discovered my wife is very into this model railroading. She has bought more stuff than I would have! She has plans to build a large layout, complete with a Swiss Chalet village somewhere on the mtn. I was going for mainly a freight operation. I now will have at least three passenger lines, also. I don't mean to be "preachy," but there is an excellent book entitled "The Five Love Languages." by Gary Chapman. If you can't find it in your local bookstore, try a Christian bookstore. My wife and I started reading this as an assignment when we were going to premarital counselling.
  9. eightyeightfan1

    eightyeightfan1 Now I'm AMP'd

    A dozen roses once a week.
    Something real nice on her birthday....
  10. RonP

    RonP Member of the WMRC

    Wake up real early and model then and only then.
  11. jbaakko

    jbaakko Active Member

    I'm not gonna directly suggest to "save" the relationship, but rather, say, work on it. If she cannot respect your hobbies, and keep them out of arguments, then it sounds like a lost cause already, but thats not for me to judge.

    Honestly, I don't argue with my wife, I just wander off...
  12. shaygetz

    shaygetz Active Member

    My beloved stands by my hobby. She's even given up a large chunk of our bedroom for me to have room for it. Quite frankly, it looks more like my den than her bedroom but she's never made a fuss:oops:.

    I, in turn, don't even buy so much as a tube of cement without her knowing about it. I buy only used equipment and do anything else that might make it easier on our budget. 75% or more of my hobby is self supporting through my knowledge of older trains and their resale value. It helps that she likes the hobby and appreciates what it does for me. She's even my IT girl on the web page and provided many ideas for the piece of furniture that houses my layout/her homeschool and cookbook library. The B&MC comes from our initials and car numbers from significant dates and ages in our family. Our kids are allowed access to the layout with reasonable restrictions---"Son, you just can't push that N scale 4-8-4 around the carpet...":eek:

    It may sound surreal but it's worked without fail for 17 years of marriage. I hope it works out for you, even if it means leaving it all boxed for awhile before you go laying track again.
  13. ed acosta

    ed acosta Member

    HOLY SMOKE!!! Another model railroader, TV actor Gary Coleman and his wife are calling it quits! So, what is it about us? Do our wives find it a turn-off that we have more trains than brains? Why can't our wives understand that maintaining a layout requires more housework than the rest of the house? And, through our collective wisdom, we are the best "Mr. Fixits" in the neighborhood, just don't bother us while the epoxy is curing, or in the middle of a decal application. Yeah, I think our marriages will become more solid once we get the respect we deserve. Right?
  14. Ralph

    Ralph's for fun!

  15. jbaakko

    jbaakko Active Member

    No way, Gary Coleman is into trains!?
  16. shaygetz

    shaygetz Active Member

    Rod Stewart, Micheal Gross of "Family Ties" and "Tremors", Niel Young...we're everywhere...:eek::p:mrgreen:
  17. scubadude

    scubadude Member

    My wife said she was going to leave me if I kept on "playing with those *&#% trains", I sure am going to miss her!! sign1
  18. kokoracer

    kokoracer Member

    Thanks for the feedback everyone. Guess I have some work to do. I always put the RR on the bottom of the $$ list. Have to domove it down the priority list too.
  19. RobertInOntario

    RobertInOntario Active Member

    It's definitely a balancing act. I find that life is all about balance. I have to limit the amount of time I spend on my hobby. I can easily get carried away and spend hours down the basement, getting caught up with creating scenery and running trains.

    Both Ralph and SgtCarl's advice is very sound and I agree totally with them (sounds like a great Chapman book!). I also don't want to sound preachy, but you basically have to weigh your priorities.

    I often tell myself that it is healthy to put my layout aside for awhile. It actually improves the hobby by keeping it fresh and not over-doing it. My signature/tag line kind of fits in with this topic as well!

  20. TA462

    TA462 New Member

    I could never imagine my wife ever saying she is going to do any serious damage to anything I own.

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