This was given me recently by an old railroader...
The Railroad Chain of Command
President:
Leaps tall buildings in a single bound.
Is more powerful than a locomotive.
Is faster than a speeding bullet.
Walks on water.
Gives policy to God.
Vice President:
Leaps short buildings in a single bound.
Is more powerful than a switch engine.
I just as fast as a speeding bullet.
Talks with Cod.
General Superintendent:
Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds.
Is almost as powerful as switch engine.
Is faster than a speeding BB.
Walks on the water in an indoor swimming pool.
Talks with God if special request is approved.
Superintendent:
Barely clears a Quonset hut.
Loses tug of war with a locomotive.
Can fire a speeding bullet.
Swims well.
Is occasionally addressed by God.
Trainmaster:
Makes high marks on the wall when trying to leap buildings.
Is run over by a locomotive.
Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury.
Talks to animals.
Assistant Trainmaster:
Runs into buildings.
Recognizes locomotives two out of three times.
Is not issued ammunition.
Can stay afloat with a life jacket.
Talks to walls.
Yardmaster:
Falls over doorsteps when. trying to enter buildings.
Says, "Look at the choo-choo."
Wets himself with a water pistol.
Plays in mud puddles.
Mumbles to himself.
Conductor:
Lifts buildings and walks under them.
Kicks locomotives off the tracks.
Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them.
Freezes water with a single glance--
HE IS GOD.
The Railroad Chain of Command
President:
Leaps tall buildings in a single bound.
Is more powerful than a locomotive.
Is faster than a speeding bullet.
Walks on water.
Gives policy to God.
Vice President:
Leaps short buildings in a single bound.
Is more powerful than a switch engine.
I just as fast as a speeding bullet.
Talks with Cod.
General Superintendent:
Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds.
Is almost as powerful as switch engine.
Is faster than a speeding BB.
Walks on the water in an indoor swimming pool.
Talks with God if special request is approved.
Superintendent:
Barely clears a Quonset hut.
Loses tug of war with a locomotive.
Can fire a speeding bullet.
Swims well.
Is occasionally addressed by God.
Trainmaster:
Makes high marks on the wall when trying to leap buildings.
Is run over by a locomotive.
Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury.
Talks to animals.
Assistant Trainmaster:
Runs into buildings.
Recognizes locomotives two out of three times.
Is not issued ammunition.
Can stay afloat with a life jacket.
Talks to walls.
Yardmaster:
Falls over doorsteps when. trying to enter buildings.
Says, "Look at the choo-choo."
Wets himself with a water pistol.
Plays in mud puddles.
Mumbles to himself.
Conductor:
Lifts buildings and walks under them.
Kicks locomotives off the tracks.
Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them.
Freezes water with a single glance--
HE IS GOD.